Aging and Our Mental Health Crisis with Meghan Judge

Join Kosta and his guest: Meghan Judge, Host of Judging Meghan, a podcast created with the mission of ending the stigma surrounding mental health and trauma.

Today we’re talking about aging and our mental health crisis.

In this episode:  Are changes in personality and behavior a normal and expected part of aging? What should you say to someone that is resistant to seeking the mental help they need at any age? How can families and healthcare professionals better support seniors with mental health issues?

Watch this episode on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEkT2IzJOpI

Find out more about  Meghan Judge:
https://judgingmeghan.com/

Listen to Judging Meghan Podcast:
https://judgingmeghan.com/latest-episodes/

Find out more about Kosta Yepifantsev:
http://kostayepifantsev.com/

Transcript

Meghan Judge: 0:05

A lot of people that are of retirement age now I'm sure you know this don't want to retire. And it's because they know because they are now going well I see my friends and all they do is like sit in front of a TV. They don't take care of their their mental health is goes along with their gut health goes along with their physical fitness, right? So a lot of them just kind of give up. It's all connected.

Caroline Moore: 0:32

Welcome to Now or Never Long-Term Care Strategy with Kosta Yepifantsev a podcast for all those seeking answers and solutions in the long term care space. This podcast is designed to create resources, start conversations and bring awareness to the industry that will inevitably impact all Americans. Here's your host Kosta Yepifantsev.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 0:55

Hey, y'all, this is Kosta and today I'm here with my guest Meghan judge, host of judging Meghan a podcast created with a mission of ending the stigma surrounding mental health and trauma. Today we're talking about aging, and our mental health crisis. So Meghan, we get this question all the time, or changes in personality and behavior, a normal and expected part of aging?

Meghan Judge: 1:19

Well, first of all, thank you so much for having me on. Absolutely. To answer your question. Yes, I think so. I think that, as we age, there's so much of there's so many things that are great about aging, you know, like that the bad part is we don't physically look the same as we did in our 20s. And then, as we go on, we look worse and worse. But the best part is the wisdom and the knowledge that we inevitably hopefully have, and life learned lessons by the time we're older. But I do think that the amount of wisdom that we inherently have, by the time we're older is, you know, that's, I believe, a good change and something that, you know, people, the elderly should be glorified for that I know, for me personally, I have found that being around older people is something that I love doing. I actually take this lady to Mass every Sunday, I'm Catholic, so I go to masseuse. And she's about she's 89. Her name's Pat. And I just love hearing her stories, she has so many amazing stories, you know, and I think a lot of times people are afraid of, of learning about people that might be like, have come from a different generation, and there may be like, scared off because they're gonna say the wrong thing. They're people just like where people?

Kosta Yepifantsev: 2:50

Absolutely I think we don't give I don't, I think that we just don't give seniors people that are elderly, enough credit. And, you know, they have so much to offer so much wisdom. And we discredit them, like you're saying, you know, we just kind of discount their worth, and we don't take the time to build relationships with them, because they may not be on the same pace, essentially, that we are on. And that's sad, because they've already got so much life experience and have lived through so many things, struggles, etc. I mean, if you think about it, people that are CEOs of major companies are usually identified for their skills, but more importantly for their experience. And when it's not someone in a position of power and influence, and they're, you know, over the age of 65, then it's like, oh, well, you know, they're they don't know what they're talking about, or they're stuck in the in the old times, you know, and the world's new and shiny and what can they do to contribute to the narrative? So I think you're absolutely right.

Meghan Judge: 3:55

I think too, like as a society, we're we're so ageist, you know, and it's a major, major issue. I think that what we all need to remember is, you know, we could be in our 30s and 40s and 50s, and even 60s and be successful and taken seriously in the world or in the business world. And then it's like you're kind of thrown out to pasture and you're expected to, like sit in front of a TV and play golf. Yeah. And, and it's, that's not that's not fair. People don't should not have earned, like, where they're supposed to go backwards and be an infant again, I find that my friend or the people that I know that are you know, maybe at the end of their life, including my own mom, who's in her late 70s Yes, she might report she might tell me a story three times, you know, or they're a little like slower to you know, they can't do the same things physically that we can do, but you

Kosta Yepifantsev: 4:57

wouldn't get mad at your kids. If now Exactly. It's such a good point. So Megan, what are the signs that someone might have a mental health condition that should be addressed?

Meghan Judge: 5:08

I mean, that is a great question. I don't have an answer for that. Honestly, you don't look at what happened yesterday. Yeah. I mean, it was so sad all day with the Twitch that the producer that committed suicide. So that's what happened to him. It was it was yeah, it was a gunshot. It was a gunshot wound to

Kosta Yepifantsev: 5:31

my gosh, and he's only 40 years old. 40 years old.

Meghan Judge: 5:34

I'm completely like, I mean, I know me personally, I was so upset all day yesterday, because as like, we really are way too into Instagram. Everybody knows that. But I would follow Instagram and his family and his wife and they were so happy. And I loved watching their dancing. And he was always smiling. And my point is you just never know, like, how do you know that somebody has is suffering with their mental health. I personally was diagnosed with complex PTSD, stemming from my childhood, a lot of trauma I went through, and that was a few years ago. And you would if I didn't tell you, you would probably have never known because I high I did. I don't anymore. I'm very honest. And that's part of why I started my podcast, but I hid behind jokes and humor. And I was always kind of like the life of the party. So you don't that question is so hard to, to answer, because you really don't know, unless you're somebody with like a case of like, you know, bipolar and, or like, like, it's like severe schizophrenia, your schizophrenia, you would maybe you wouldn't even know it if somebody was suffering with like major depressive disorder a lot of times. So there's really no answer to that. It's kind of like, if the sports analogy of like playing through an injury, like say, you hurt your shoulder, right. And your foot, my nephew happens to be a football player. And he's he plays for TCU, actually, so they're going to laughs Yeah. Johnny Hodges, I love him. Anyways, so he hurt his shoulder. And he was still playing through. And nobody would have known it because he was sitting there still tackling people and doing his job. Well, it's the same thing with our brains. You know, we we have the capability as humans to hide so much, because this massive Oregon, you know, isn't really like you're not wearing a cast on it. You just don't know. Right?

Kosta Yepifantsev: 7:51

Right. Yeah. And I think you said it really well, when you were talking about social media and projecting that image, while at the same time you said the most important thing in your journey was was coming out and speaking about it, you know, I'm talking and you, I'm just I'm trying to put all this together, because I knew Twitch had passed away, I just didn't know that he had committed suicide. I think so many people in our society, and honestly, this happens in the long term care space. Often, people suffer in silence, you know, and it's even more pronounced when you go into like a nursing facility, when you're in an institution, that type of base care, facility based care. They suffer because they're isolated, they suffer because they don't want to be there. And I mean, you take when you take care of your mom, are there ever things that you notice that she may or may not do? When being a healthcare medical, or I'm sorry, a mental health professional, that you can see that and say, Oh, I know what that is, and I know how to fix it.

Meghan Judge: 8:59

Well, my mom, thankfully, my mom is seven, she just turned 79. The woman does Pilates five days a week. And she looks like she's probably 60. She's in great health. The only thing that my mom really has going on is dementia happens to run in our family on both sides, which is very scary. But she says she's getting to that age. I mean, it's like, you know, our physical body slow down. You know, we when we get hit a certain age, we can't like run, we can't do certain things a lot of times, same thing with our minds. So if you're going to tell a story three times, so my mom is definitely not one that I really am worried about, like taking care of. I don't take care of her right now. She lives in Florida. I have three other siblings. They're closer to her. Yeah, I've already said you can move to California when it's your time. But yeah, so I can't really answer the question about my mom. I'm in particular, but I can tell you I can tell you just in general, having lived through my my aunt being suffering with dementia and slowing down and all of that stuff, I wasn't witnessing it. But I just know how hard it was for my sister. Yeah, to go through and to touch on something you just said, I'm getting help with your mental health. And I, by the way, I'm no professional, like I am somebody that does a mental health podcast. Because I decided a few years ago, when I was at my lowest point, I wasn't going out that way. And instead of the, you know, I'm very upfront and honest with my own battles with suicidal ideations and all of that, I decided I was going to stay. And I picked myself up and I started a podcast without even really understanding what it was. And now it's way to do it. Yeah. And now, I mean, that's what I do. And I think, going backwards a little bit, just to touch on what you said, it's a generational thing, you know, people that are in their 70s, and 80s, and 90s. We're barely touching the surface of being a generation or society coming out of COVID, that feels comfortable saying, Oh, I have depression, I'm suffering. They don't, there's no way that somebody sitting in assisted living or anything like that, would ever feel like it's okay, so, so sad, because they're really suffering in silence, because they can't speak up. And it's hot. It's not okay.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 11:45

Right. So what you're saying is, is for the, for the elderly population, these issues are even more pronounced, and then they're not going to talk about it. And so we need to be even more keen on finding ways to start these conversations, and identifying tools, what strategies can be used to reduce the stigma around mental health and aging adults? And also, how can we empower our older generations to prioritize mental health?

Meghan Judge: 12:15

That is such a good question, I really think it's about once again, educating them. And in the United States, we have so many uphill battles with mental health, obviously, with homelessness, and all the things that go on shootings, like everything we deal with in the United States. But I think with the elderly, we really need to have a system in place where they can have like cap free counseling, and they can have like, it should be normal, it should just be normalized, we as a society would not have the issues that we have, if we just made mental health, one of the top priorities in our country.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 13:01

You know, I was talking to a friend of mine, and he worked for the state of Tennessee, so I'm based in Tennessee, he works for the state. And, you know, we all know that anytime that you work for a government agency, you have fantastic health insurance, right? We were talking about him going to therapy, and he has to pay first off, he can't find a therapist in his area. So most rural communities, small towns don't have access to you know, a wide array of therapists or counselors for that matter. So he has to drive probably about an hour and a half drive. He has to pay almost $100 per session out of pocket with insurance. And I asked him, I said, you know, why not, you know, make it free or like a $10 copay or something like that. And for some reason, that's not been a area that you know, healthcare in general has wanted to address.

Meghan Judge: 14:02

Well, I'll tell you something that makes me infuriates me. So that is very, very sad. There are resources, I would highly recommend for people to look into something like better help. Yes, they are one of my sponsors, but I personally use better help, because I was in therapy. And my therapist was writing a book and kind of took a break. And I was like, if I'm, if I'm going to be promoting a company, I'm going to try it myself. Sure. So that that would be a great resource for people across the country that don't have access and or are in rural rural communities. But I also think, I 100% understand what he and so many people in this country are going through. I worked in corporate America for 15 years of my life. I had started having massive panic attacks. I could not work anymore. This was like, right, going right into 2020. And now my I'm an independent podcast like, that's my job. That's what I do. And it's my and I, what was it the pressure? Yeah, like,

Kosta Yepifantsev: 15:16

what was what was it? Because I have heard that story before. And it's very often like, what about that environment, and you don't have to go into too much detail, if you don't want to know I'm

Meghan Judge: 15:25

very open about it. So I was, I just went through, I was basically at a boiling point with all the trauma from my childhood, pushing it pushing it down. I went to this really bad friend breakup, very long story. So I felt at the time this was going into 2020, extremely isolated, upset, like, UPS depressed. And then I always kind of had suffered with panic attacks. But it was at a boiling point where I was having such bad panic attacks that I would wake up at night and thought I was dying. Oh, well, I think the combination of everything and then having the pressure, I was a female in sales, I was always looked upon as a number. I am somebody that when I was in corporate America and sales, I was always pushing myself to be the best kind of an overachiever. And then I know the feeling Yeah. And then I just, you know, I think that we're, we're in, we're just pushed to our limits, and people push. It's all about money and consumerism. And it's not about like, it's kind of like a facade, where we're all just like, obsessed with materialism, and all these things. And then it's really blacking out what's really important, which is obviously getting help and mental health. And then just to like, piggyback on one other thing I said, was when I lost when I ended up, like leaving my job, due to COVID, and everything else, the panic attacks. I then had to pay and my insurance for my family was like 1600 a month, I had always been in a job where I had like, perfect insurance. Yeah, think about all the people that maybe don't qualify for, you know, insurance, and they make over a certain amount. So they have to pay that it doesn't make any sense. It makes sense.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 17:27

You know, a lot of the issues that I think everybody experiences some type of PTSD or trauma, whether it's mild or severe. I think everybody does. But I have been going to therapy for six years now. And I'll be honest, like, if that wasn't an outlet or an avenue? I don't know, I don't know, what would have happened. You know, I answered so many underlying issues, questions, I guess you could say, during therapy, and I see a lot of people suffering. And that's why I really am curious, like when someone is resistant to seeking mental help. What do you tell that person?

Meghan Judge: 18:16

Well, I number one, I always tell my listeners or people that you know, I think because I've been doing this a little while people just assume I'm a good resource. I don't know why. But anyway, I say that that finding the right therapist, and I'm sure you can agree with this is like going on a blind date, or like, I never did the dating where the online dating, but it's kind of like doing, doing your research, like going on these bad dates to find the good person that you want to date. It's the same thing with therapy, right? You might have to interview a couple therapists go to a couple of sessions to find the right one. I think that I went through that personally, where for years, I had kind of like, been in and out of therapy. And then I happened to find this amazing therapist, and, and I was able to not only like put in the work and do the work because you have to write like if you're just gonna, like, do phonons and be like, No, everything's fine. And it is hard. Like, I mean, some days I'm sure you can relate to this. You dread going to therapy or like I have nothing to talk about sign today. Yes. But then you leave or you're like, Oh, I didn't realize I had to talk about that. Yeah, right.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 19:33

And, you know, so my therapist always hands out. He always gives hand handouts like tango, ABC, stuff like that. And he's always say, now listen, you need to actually read this and try this. Don't come back and just, you know, put it in with all the other papers that you have. And you're absolutely right. You have to do the work if you want to improve.

Meghan Judge: 19:55

And then we're always to like just to give you like a pat on the shoulder. A little bit even though we just met for men like for men to be like, I'm going into therapy, I'm doing therapy. I, it's so frowned upon, you know, like, for for men in general, like they feel like, Oh, I'm strong, I can get through this. Whereas the highest suicide rates are men. So women are taught from a young age like we're chatters, we love to talk about with our girlfriends or friends. Like I can't believe my boyfriend did this. I love the law. And men really just like are taught to like, hold things in. Yeah, and then don't get me started on the African American black community. That is, you know, I've done that. And they just won't, they won't. They're taught to hold it all in. Yeah,

Kosta Yepifantsev: 20:48

I'll tell you, there's a good documentary called the mask we wear or the mat it's about, it's about young boys and teenage boys. It's on Prime Video, I believe. Anyway, long story short, it discusses primarily how boys are raised to you know, you can't cry in public. You know, if you're 10 years old, and you're crying in public, you know, your parents, your friends, all of society thinks there's something wrong with you. So you bottle up all of this emotion, right? And it eats away at you unless you're able to express yourself. And so I've got I've got four kids, and two of them are boys, ones are oldest, eight years old. And the other one is for spent to be five and April, okay. And I try, I almost go out of my way to try to make them feel comfortable when they're just trying to be themselves. So if you want to cry, go ahead and cry. And it's just because, like, a lot of the issues that I have was similar to what you were saying earlier about. My dad was, hey, you got to be the best. You got to be an overachiever. You know, things are hard. Don't don't, you know, don't show any emotion, just push through it. And so you hold yourself to this incredibly difficult standard. And it's very difficult to it's almost impossible to reach it, you know, nobody's perfect. But you hold yourself to that perfect standard, and it eats away. I think a lot of times that your self confidence. And you develop other problems because of it. So

Meghan Judge: 22:33

100% Yeah, I think that's great. I think the more men that teach their young boys to be themselves and talk about their problems. I mean, that's the work that we have to do. Again, if we can't get people into therapy, we have, we have jobs, a job as parents, I have two young girls, and it's really important to me that I got my older daughter, who is in her tween hood. She's about to be 13 and into therapy right away, because I think that what these kids have to go through right now with just so much like tick tock like, it never saw media. It just never ends.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 23:19

I'm terrified when my kids turning 13 I'm just I mean, I'm just like, they have iPads that, you know, they play yeah, five minutes a day. But they're not. They're playing Roblox right now.

Meghan Judge: 23:33

Yeah, I have an eight year old and she's into that I let I let her. I let my kids I do allow them on social media. It's impossible. I was talking to a mom the other day, she was like, Oh, it's a parent of an eight year old, a good friend of mine in my daughter's class. And she's like, Oh, I'm not allowing my daughter to have a phone and I go. Okay, said the same thing. When every single 12 year old in the seventh grade class, has a phone and your daughter is the one kid that doesn't have a phone. Right? You start? What do I do?

Kosta Yepifantsev: 24:10

Yeah. Well, you almost do more harm than then good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So in your opinion, what's the greatest mental health threat to seniors and our aging population today?

Meghan Judge: 24:24

I think it goes back to what we talked about a little while ago, isolation. A lot of people that are of retirement age now I'm sure you know, this don't want to retire. And it's because they know because they are now going well, I see my friends and all they do is like sit in front of a TV. They don't take care of their like their their mental health is goes along with their gut health goes along with their physical fitness, right. So a lot of them just kind of give up. It's all connected. So I think the isolation piece of it is Self isolation. I mean, my mom is 79 years old. I hate to pick on My poor mom. But I adore her. And I just told you, she does Pilates five days a week. It's amazing. She is goes out with her friends for like a margarita night. She is very socially active. Like she's always, you know, chatting with friends and going to coffee and doing things. But she also still works. And she's 79 She works like one day a week in a store. It's amazing. And I'm like, Mom, why are you still working? And she goes, Megan, it's really good. For me, it helps me like I have to do the register and like check people out. And it sounds really funny. But she got an end, not to mention the fact that she volunteers in a hospital once a week to wow, she does kind of like a candy striper position, you know, and goes and talks to patients and to help my mom, you know, stay non not isolated, you know, and so I think she's, that's something that people really should think about as they age. Right? You know,

Kosta Yepifantsev: 26:09

I think that you said it really well, like people don't want to retire. It's almost like they throw up the white flag when they retire. You know, it's like, okay, I'm out, you know, I'm done. But what they don't realize is that retirement, as long as they follow kind of a similar pattern, where they don't isolate themselves, a lot of times, especially if someone gets injured, or let's just say like they go, they have a traumatic medical event, like maybe a stroke or heart attack or something like that, and it changes their life significantly. They're like, I can't face everybody. I can't face my friends, I can't face my people that I know, in the community, because I'm different. Now, you know, before I could walk, you know, with a steady gait, you know, no problem. But now, maybe because I have some pair, like, maybe it's an issue, I was paralyzed on the left side or something like that, I look different, I feel different. I am different. And so whether or not people will accept me, I don't know, I'd rather just not fool with it altogether. And I see that a lot. Because when I talk to family members of some of the individuals that receive care within my agency, and they tell me how different they were prior to their disability, and I think to myself, what if that individual talked to a therapist, and was able to sort of connect the dots between why they feel the way that they do now? And how their, their their perception of their disabilities affecting them? So, for what that's worth,

Meghan Judge: 27:48

no, I think it's a great point. I mean, it's like an Olympian training and hurting themselves, and then they think their life is over. Yeah. And it's, it's about, you know, they're still young enough that they can pick themselves up and, and, and go on a lot of aging is about ego, right? Yep. And so if if somebody in their senior years, like, let's say, takes a fall, well, they have to do the therapy, the physical therapy to get themselves while but a lot of times I think they just give up. Yeah. And that and that, again, is connected with the mental health piece.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 28:26

Absolutely. And yeah, your mom does not go to therapy,

Meghan Judge: 28:30

right. My mom is of the generation that she and my mom actually was on my podcast, and has been through more trauma than probably most people could ever imagine. And she should have been in therapy, but she has never been in therapy.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 28:49

How do you support her and her decision to choose to not go to therapy.

Meghan Judge: 28:55

I mean, that's the thing you can only, like, you can only encourage somebody so much, you know, to to do the the work a lot of times, people it's like teaching an old dog new tricks, and I hate to say old dog, but if they don't want to try and learn the trick or do the work, they're just not going to do it. And my mom's one of those people. She is kind of set in her ways. She knows she's been through stuff. She's very spiritual. She is a great person, but she kind of has been gotten to the point where she's like, well, it is what it is like this trauma. This stuff happened to me. And it is what it is. Yeah. Whereas I know she suffers and, you know, is in pain, but at least she's doing the best she can with what she has. Yeah.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 29:53

It's it's really interesting when you talk about different generations. And again, Another conversation that I have very often with people in the healthcare industry is it's hard to change people. And so it's almost like you adapt a system for a specific generation. And then you adapt. And then you completely adapt. And then you completely change your adaptation for a different generation. And so our health care system caters to the senior population one way caters to the millennial Gen Z population a different way. And I think a lot of it has to do with with funding. And the reason that I bring that up is because, you know, obviously, people over the age of 65, qualify for Medicare, and Medicare pays 80% of physical ailments. So like the claims that that say, for example, if you have, you know, if you get hip surgery or something, Medicare will pay for 80% for mental health treatment, they will only pay 50%. So you can see where they place value. But I'm curious, where in your, in your experience, where do people go to seek mental health care if they don't have a lot of money?

Meghan Judge: 31:22

Okay, that's a great question. A lot of times, schools offer free mental like, so if it's a therapist and training, so colleges, like local community colleges, even or local, if you live near a major university, they have their they have people that are, you know, in their getting their, you know, they're in their final year and they have to do cases and they have that free service so people can reach out that way. And try mench I mentioned earlier better help is it does it does cost money. But I don't feel like it's too expensive. I think you they have a coupon code you can use for the first month. And so there are so many new Reese, like new resources coming out for I think, especially from COVID Wow, there's such a focus now on mental health. I'm sure that people understand that and are learning that as time goes on, and it'll no matter

Kosta Yepifantsev: 32:31

how much is the better help? Is it a subscription? Or do you pay a

Meghan Judge: 32:34

monthly subscription? Okay. And you, I can't remember exactly how much it is because I haven't been doing it for like the past three months, probably. But you pay a monthly fee. So say it's like 180 for the month or something like that. And then it might be less than that for the for a month. And you can use my code, by the way, and you'll get a discount your code is charging Magan chi Chan? So yeah, I can't remember what the actual discount is. And that's great on my part that I don't even know. But yeah, so you can try that code and get a discount for your first month.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 33:14

I love it. So, before we wrap up, I want to ask you about COVID because it is a constant theme that's come up where, you know, people essentially either got laid off, or they went to go work from home. And so they spent a lot of time with themselves, their families. And one of the statistics that I've read recently is that a lot of like addiction issues have have risen tremendously during the pandemic, because people were using some type of substance to cope What was your experience, like, whenever COVID hit, and you had this fast paced job, and you had all these goals and expectations, and then it's like, go home and you know, stay safe? What was that like for you?

Meghan Judge: 34:11

I think it was, like very, a very scary time and very humbling for for everybody, not just me, you know, I think that we as a society never really realized that we would be placed in a position in 20 in the year 2020 where we had to wear a mask and be in self isolation like that or family isolation. And I think a lot of people turn to alcohol pills you know, that's why or addiction issues are so horrific right now. For me personally, I just you know, I I got through it the best way that I I was equipped to get through it like everyone else. And in some ways, I sometimes think that COVID I know this sounds insane was a blessing. Because I don't world down. Yeah, it slowed everybody down, I think, until it got political and people went crazy over it. In the, in the very beginning part of COVID, I think people started to really like look at themselves. And after drinking, like at three o'clock in the afternoon and kind of going on, they, they looked at themselves and went like, this, like Life is short. Yeah, right now, like, this is kind of scary, like, how am I gonna go on and people came out of it different forever, however, it it, it touched you.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 35:53

As a society as a whole, I think is operating. It's functioning completely different, which is which, you know, that's also in and of itself, traumatic for people. Because, you know, as human beings like, we accept change, but we don't always like change. And, you know, in literally three years, the world has been turned upside down. And as much as everybody wants to, you know, talk about the before times, and that we're almost back to the before times, I don't think we're ever going to be back. The world's a different place. And so I think now more than ever, people need therapy to better understand and I want to touch on one more thing. You were talking about addiction issues and addiction rising during the pandemic. And I'll be honest, the same exact facet applies to people that are elderly. And physically disabled. There are I don't know the exact percentage, but there are very high levels of elderly individuals taking opioids that are prescribed opioids that are prescribed various other psychoactive drugs. And if you're not talking about your problems, and you're going to use a substance to cope, so you don't have to feel or talk about it. That's a very slippery slope. So

Meghan Judge: 37:18

100% And I think that I it's funny, you say that, so I took a break from alcohol. First, I took 68 days, I know that's so random. I went to like, it was recently my birthday. So it didn't drink for, like 68 days, yeah. And then I started going down the rabbit hole of like, what alcohol does to our bodies, and how we're basically putting ethanol in our fleet, we're poisoning ourselves, and, and how alcohol had been such a crutch for me, you know, like, a form of escapism. But then when I stopped for that period of time, and I haven't gone back, I was a daily drinker, I'm very honest about that, I would drink wine every single night. I will never go back to that, because I think it all it is, is a band aid. Same thing for you know, you're talking about the elderly, and how a lot of them are being, you know, administered pills and whatever else. It's a band aid. And it's an I feel like it's never too late for somebody to, if you just kind of like open up that person, they really just want to talk, they really just want to know that somebody cares, right at the end of the day, that's all we as human beings really want is to know that we matter. And our contribution to society matters. And our stories matter and our lives matter and what we've done in our lives matter. And that's really, at the end of the day, really what happens. And then a lot of times, ego just gets in the way for everyone.

Kosta Yepifantsev: 39:05

Luckily, the world is still malleable. And we're still kind of trying to figure out what to do next with after this whole pandemic. So I think this is about as best as the chances we're going to get to, to convince people that there's a better way to do things. 100% Yeah. So we always like to end the show with a call to action. What's your best advice for anyone in the long term care industry that is seeking to promote and prioritize their mental health? Whether they be an industry professional, a caregiver, or a patient?

Meghan Judge: 39:42

Are you saying their own mental health? Yes, well, I would say you can't really seek out it you can't really administered advice and, and help other people unless you help yourself like the old saying of nobody's ever gonna love you. If you don't love yours. off, right? That's correct. So it's the same thing.

Caroline Moore: 40:04

Thank you for joining us on this episode of Now or Never Long-Term Care Strategy with Kosta Yepifantsev. If you enjoyed listening and you wanna hear more make sure you subscribe on Apple podcast Spotify or wherever you find your Podcasts, leave us a review or better yet share this episode with a friend. Now or Never Long-Term Care Strategy is a Kosta Yepifantsev production. Today’s episode was written and produced by Morgan Franklin. Want to find out more about Kosta? Visit us at kostayepifantsev.com